One of the goals of The Audacious Life is freedom.

Yes, freedom is sublime.

But…what I’ve found over the last few months is that the term means something different depending on who you talk to. For those of us living under a state of control by another person i.e. a spouse, partner, family member, boss, or friend, our definition of freedom is quite clear. For us it’s ALL about having the power to be ourselves, to speak our mind and go about our business without fear of retaliation by another.

What Webster’s says about freedom

free |frē|
adjective (freer |ˈfrēər| , freest |ˈfrēəst| )

1 not under the control or in the power of another; able to act or be done as one wishes: I have no ambitions other than to have a happy life and be free | a free choice.

freedom |ˈfrēdəm|noun: the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint: we do have some freedom of choice | he talks of revoking some of the freedoms.

When I talk to people who have always been free and blessed with a life devoid of any type of control or abuse of power, they don’t get what all the freedom talk is about. “We all have free will don’t we?” They ask quite innocently.

Of course we have free will! However…

Freedom is . . . the courage to break free

Freedom is . . . the courage to break free

Put that same person in a situation where they start out feeling loved but slowly over time the love turns to put downs, near constant criticism, disrespect for any of their thoughts or concerns, and a twisting around of reality infused with rages and potentially physical abuse.

Then combine that with restrictions. For example, over time their plans with friends and family fall through because their controlling partner finds a way to sabotage said plans.

Slowly these “free spirits” begin to see their circle of friends becoming smaller and smaller. Now, without a support group, they are left to fend for themselves in this ever growing hostile unloving environment and that easy going sense of freedom that they took for granted is now elusive.

Feeling trapped and second guessing yourself

Many have described this feeling as second guessing themselves and feeling trapped like the walls are closing in on them. Overall, there’s a sense that the person who you knew yourself to be all those years is now but a faint memory. The person you’re with who needs control tells you who you are, often disregarding what you say and replacing your statements with what they think you think.

This is a form of mind control and brainwashing.

You can defend yourself but it falls on deaf ears, and with no friends or family around you now to reinforce that belief you have in yourself as a person, it’s a slippery slope hanging onto your lifelong identity. And it takes a strong sense of self to hang onto your confidence and any sense of a carefree spirit.

So yeah, freedom is sublime. And it’s not something any one should take for granted.

My thoughts and prayers go out to those who are struggling with ongoing control and hiding their true thoughts and feelings just to get through the day without a fight or eliciting a rage. It can feel a lot like living in a police state where you’re constantly looking over your shoulder and walking on eggshells in fear.

Please reach out for help, we are here for you

I do believe in energy, God, and all things spiritual that move us forward. So if you’re in need of help or prayer please reach out via email, I would love to support you in any way that I can.

Let’s take 30 seconds each day to hold each other in our thoughts and lift each other out of darkness

And sisters reading this, I’d like to ask that we all stop and take just 30 seconds each day to send each other thoughts of love, support, and courage to get through a rough day and be filled with peace and a sense of hope for a brighter day ahead. We can use our collective energy to lift each other out of the darkness and step that much closer to the light.

Inch by inch, we will get there.

With Love and light,

Steph's Signature